HE KNEW GOING COLD TURKEY WOULD BE HARD…

He knew going cold turkey would be hard—but not this hard.

It had been two weeks since Jared had spoken to Helen. The thought of calling her made him itch, sweat, and groan in desperation.

Ever since he was born, their communication had been spotty, which was weird because she was his mom. There should be a direct line, right?

"I’m just going to see if she’s eaten," Jared muttered to himself while picking up his iPhone.

“The number you have reached has been temporarily disconnected.”

Typical, Jared thought.

There seemed to be no linear way to connect with a binge addict. Maternal instinct be damned. Now, at 29, Jared knew this was something he would have to let go of. At least, that's what he thought he knew. That's what his therapist told him anyway. But how could he? How could he sever the one connection that should've been the most important to him? To her?

The last tear had dried up years ago, along with his bank account. There was nothing more he could do for Helen.

Knowing he had to help his husband with the baby, Jared powered down his cell and headed back inside.

"You give Helen my hello?" Adair asked.

"How did you know—"

Adair gave Jared that look.

"Her phone was disconnected," he muttered.

"Well, come give this munchkin her snacks. I gotta pee!"

"Do you want fruit snacks or chicken?" Jared asked baby Elaine.

"You know she wants the chicken!" Adair yelled from the upstairs bathroom.

"Zaaaa!" Baby Elaine exclaimed, reaching for her favorite food—chicken pieces.

"You’ll always respond to your parents, won’t you, E?"

"Gaaagaaa," Elaine said.

"That’s right, and we’ll always answer your calls no matter how early or late it is. Promise," Jared said as he placed her in her high chair and opened the fridge.

Knowing he shouldn't, Jared pulled the Talenti gelato from the fridge because, when he was sad, recipe #60 had a way of being a band-aid of sorts.

"What is it about coconut shavings, almonds, and chocolate anyway?" Jared thought as he scooped and scooped. It wasn't until Elaine started crying for more snacks that he snapped out of his usual trance.

"Okay, baby girl, let’s get you and daddy tucked in," he said to Elaine after wiping her down and changing her clothes.

See, the thing was, Jared knew he couldn’t change Helen, but he needed information from her. He needed to know who her dealer was this time.

Jared had climbed into bed next to Adair and had full intentions of going to sleep. Adair, however, was watching the 9 o’clock news.

"It seems like drug dealers are dropping like flies over there in Riverdale. This reporter says there’s got to be a serial killer who’s targeting them."

Jared froze.

"A serial killer in the hood? Nice one, babe. Turn the TV off and let’s get some sleep."

"I’m trying to hear about the serial killer two towns over, and you want to go to sleep? The math ain’t mathin’, Jared."

"All I know is that me + this pillow = sleep," Jared snapped before turning over and proceeding to have a small anxiety fit.

As the sun peeked through the curtains of Jared and Adair’s grand window, Jared rose.

What’s the first thing that comes to a family man’s mind at 9:30 am on a Saturday?

Chores? Groceries? Playdates? Knives? Rope? Plastic wrap? A large bed pickup truck? Bleach? Creek?

"I’m glad you’re finally up!" Adair said from the bathroom. "I’m taking Elaine to my mom’s all day since you have that journalism conference over in Fremont. That is today, isn’t it?"

"Can I wake up first? I still got crust in my eyes, and you’re talking about journalism," said Jared.

He really needed a second to sort out his lies. Did I really say journalism conference? Damn, now I gotta write something. Find a free cup or sweater. Damn, why would I say a journalism conference?

"Yes, the conference in Fremont. That is where I’ll be. It’s going to run until just before dinner. Can I pick something up?"

"That would be most helpful, kind sir."

"You play too much," Jared laughed.

"Isn’t that why you love me? Now come kiss this baby so we can go. I’ll tell my parents you’ll see them some Saturday this year."

"Tell Mama Gladys I’ll be over soon, and I want some greens!"

"You tell her!" Adair shouted from the garage.

This is when Jared turned into someone unrecognizable.

Looking in the mirror, dressed in all-black gym gear, Jared pulled on his baseball cap and headed to his shed. After meticulously moving some gardening supplies and holiday decorations, Jared found what he was looking for.

Knives. Rope. Plastic wrap. Keys to a large bed pickup truck. And medical-grade cleaning bleach.